This article was originally written forour housing co-operative's
newsletter. Even though it was written in the context of a housing co-operative, I think the idea is useful in other contexts as well.
The word "antagonistic" and its relatives generally have negative connotations. Nobody likes to be antagonized. In literature, the antagonist in a story works against the protagonist or main character, so we do not like to see the antagonist succeed. However, antagonism can be essential in some cases. Many of our muscles come in what are called "antagonistic pairs," without which you would not be able to move. Muscles can only pull (by contracting) and relax; muscles cannot push. If you only had biceps, you would only be able to bend your arm; you also need your triceps in order to be able to straighten your arm. Your basic movements rely on muscles that oppose each other, yet work together to allow you to walk, lift, or write.
But sometimes our muscles do not work as they should. If you have ever experienced a cramp, you know how painful this can be sometimes. A cramp happens when a muscle suddenly tightens and will not loosen. Many cases of back pain are also due to muscles that fail to relax as they should. Some people require regular massage therapy due to pain caused by tight muscles.
As a co-operative, we should strive to operate like a well functioning body. As members of our co-operative, we all have different opinions and priorities, and we pull our co-operative in different directions. Some people may be more focused on providing activities for our children, and some are more focused on helping our elders adapt to new challenges. Some people prefer to be frugal, while others may wish to spend money to improve the quality of life here. Some people value a strict adherence to our bylaws, while others adopt a more "live and let live" attitude. Each of these views is welcome in our co-operative, and we should celebrate our differences. Indeed, without different opinions pulling us in different directions, our co-operative would be as lifeless as a skeleton with no muscles.
But in order for our co-operative to get anywhere, we must be willing, not just to pull in the direction that we want to go, but also to sometimes let go when others are pulling in a different direction. Sometimes we must allow other members to go ahead with their opinions and priorities without getting in their way.
Unlike our bodies, however, our co-operative does not have a central "brain" coordinating our actions, telling us when to pull and when to let go. Instead we must, as a co-operative, come to an agreement among ourselves. We must communicate with each other, and come to understand the perspectives of other members. Then we can decide when each member should have an opportunity to pull so that we do not prevent our co-op from moving forward by pulling in opposite directions at the same time.
We often see people with opposing viewpoints as adversaries. But while we may be antagonistic, we can still be co-operative.
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